Dr. Chasuble Goes To The Principal's Office

(Canon Chasuble and Principal Lapidus sit in her office. He has been sent down by one of the teachers because he attempted to perform a baptism in her class)

L: Good Morning, "I am your principal, Mrs. Lapidus" (57).
C: "And how are we this morning?"(22). I have dearly wished to meet you for quite some time, Lady Lapidus.
L: Yes, well it is a shame we have to meet under these conditions Dr. Chasuble. It seems your teacher, Mrs. Rogoff, sent you to me for misconduct during class.
C: Ah, Mrs. Rogoff, "she is the most cultivated of ladies, and the very picture of respectability" (50). However, "that is strange" she sent me to you, for two men specifically asked me to give them baptisms in class (23).
L: "I'm not sure I follow you...Do you mean" you were going to baptize two students at school (58)? That is against the rules, Dr. Chasuble.
C: "I am grieved to hear such sentiments from you," Lady Lapidus (50). It is not as if "I am gonna get real weird with it." The baptisms I mean. Short and sweet. "Both these gentlemen have expressed a desire for immediate baptism" (50).
L: I am sorry, but I must forbid it.
C: Well, I have never been so insulted in my life! I plan to "make some slight allusion to this tragic domestic affliction next Sunday" (27)!
L: Detention, Dr. Chasuble!